“I do not have my life back, I found a better one.”

Although no two ketamine journeys are the same, the results are universal and profound. Read the testimonial of one of our patients.

I experienced trauma and my mind was on repeat. The past came to the present and my body was in a constant state of fight, flight, or freeze reactions. I could not sleep. I felt like I tried everything and I was more than desperate. I exercised with high intensity cardio for hours a day, took medications, even stopped eating and though my body was exhausted my mind went back to the trauma with never ending questions, “Why did it happen? Was there something I could have done? Why me?”

Drawing and studying gave me a small amount of relief because it forced me to be present and created distance from the haunting of the trauma. But inside I felt like my purpose was erased, as if it never existed and I was a ghost with no direction. I could not find meaning for why I suffered. I felt no purpose in my daily routine. I worked, but with no lasting meaning or conviction. I studied the bible, yet felt like I was in Hell. I felt empty, that living was a lie. I lost interest in pursuing my continuing education because there was no changing the present or my past. I saw the concern from family and friends, but I seemed to feel worse each day and I told my fiance I wanted to leave and no longer be a part of this life. I was ready to die and had decided when and where.

I was introduced to ketamine and heard how people experience dissociations and have gained a meaning and perspective from the experience. I decided for the sake of those who have invested their love and energy into me it was worth a last-ditch effort. I came to Sovereign Mind Psychiatry and shared where I was in life and they agreed to work with me as long as I would be willing to follow up with them. I agreed. They told me about the possible increased blood pressure, nausea or slight dizziness, but that all seemed insignificant in comparison to what I had been feeling. Actually the process was painless and simple. During my first treatment I literally felt my guard lifted and I felt I could trust my environment. A little more into the session I saw my trauma with acceptance, like it and I were a part of something sacred, and then the suffering left me with peace and gratitude for living. Each treatment has left me with a more profound conviction and peace.

It has been a year and half since my first treatment and I realize it was the greatest investment in myself I ever made. I have been freed from the pain of my trauma. Yes, I think about it from time to time, but it provides me peace instead of suffering. I am thankful for the time I have on this earth and have confidence and purpose that is so intimate that I cannot think of wasting it. I know regardless of what happens in life, that I am not alone. That is a conviction down to my core. I realize I am blessed to be living and lucky to return the smiles of strangers, family, friends, and my fiance. Now I can sleep deeply and I feel energized each day. Sometimes I wake up early so I can watch the sunrise or take a walk and share vibrations of kindness and gratitude. I have decided to resume my education and inspire the change I have received.

I do not have my life back, I found a better one.